008

TITLE TOWN?


Mmm, victory is sweet. This is dedicated to Jamesies who thought Detroit would win.
Basically, I go to Valdosta State University and felt the need to brag.
Pinch yourself people, you're not dreaming.
THAT JUST HAPPENED.

007

DUDE!

So, I just took this personality test. And it's so accurate, it's scary. It described everything about me. I'm like, in awe right now. I definitely recommend you take it & post the outcome of your results.


http://www.humanmetrics.com/cgi-win/JTypes1.htm

Here's my description.
ESFP

"Where's the party?" ESFPs love people, excitement, telling stories and having fun. The spontaneous, impulsive nature of this type is almost always entertaining. And ESFPs love to entertain -- on stage, at work, and/or at home. Social gatherings are an energy boost to these "people" people.

SPs sometimes think and talk in more of a spider-web approach. Several of my ESFP friends jump from thought to thought in mid-sentence, touching here or there in a manner that's almost incoherent to the listener, but will eventually cover the waterfront by skipping on impulse from one piece of information to another. It's really quite fascinating.

New! ESFPs are attracted to new ideas, new fashions, new gadgets, new ______. Perhaps it's the newness of life that attracts ESFPs to elementary education, especially to preschool and kindergarten.

ESFPs love to talk to people about people. Some of the most colorful storytellers are ESFPs. Their down-to-earth, often homespun wit reflects a mischievous benevolence.

Almost every ESFP loves to talk. Some can be identified by the twenty minute conversation required to ask or answer a simple factual question.

It may not seem accurate about me to some of you, but those who know REALLY know me ... know that's exactly like me.

006

Talk less, Say more.

Sound familiar? It's one thing in my life I haven't yet mastered. I always end up saying too much. I have a lot on my mind right now. I'm at this point in my life where I'm really not happy. Sometimes I just like, fall into these .. moments of sadness. I'm not going to call it depression because I don't think it's that serious. I'm honestly just not happy. I just keep to myself for the most part. I feel like my friends and I are drifting apart, especially me & my best. We have that kind of friendship where we don't have to say that we'll always be there for each other because we just feel that we always will. I know she'd be there for me and she knows I'd be there for her. We don't have to tell each other that. But lately I feel like that's not even the case. I've been home for summer since the beginning of May and I could probably count on two hands the number of times I've seen her. She didn't even make it to my birthday get together. Nonetheless, she spends every weekend with her boyfriend. Friday, Saturday & Sunday. I know everyone is changing, but sometimes I wonder if I'm the only one who has changed. I blame myself for everything, honestly. I'm pretty outspoken, but this time I have kept my mouth shut. Every time I speak my opinion, shit hits the fan. I'm starting to wonder if keeping this to myself is worse than speaking on it. This overwhelming feeling of sadness isn't like me at all. I'm always laughing. Even my IM's are filled with LMAO's & LOL's. It's just not like me. I know a lot of how I'm feeling has to do with personal issues going on in my life that I don't wish to share with the entire world. I'm trying so hard to change and just be a better person.

Big ups to Brooke's blog today. That shit hit close to home. It's as if she took exactly what's inscribed on my heart and typed it out. I try to just let things happen, but I get so impatient. I try to act like I'm not waiting for *him to come to me, but I really am. Sometimes I feel like it's never going to happen. That's probably my greatest fear-- to spend my life alone. I always end up feeling like no matter what I do, I'm never good enough for anyone. It seems like a lot of friends my age have already found someone special and here I am with nobody. I'm sorry if this feels like a pity blog where I'm begging you to feel sorry for me. That's really not it at all. I'm just feeling a need to express myself.

Never in my life have I felt so ugly or unwanted. Not just physically, but in every way. I really don't like who I am. There's so much I need to change, but I swear to God I'm so weak. I feel like the reason I feel like I do is because I let people control my happiness. I let people hurt me. I need to learn to do things for myself and only myself. Let me control how I feel. That's what I'm going to work on this week. Pleasing myself. Fuck everyone in this world who has ever done anything to put me down and fuck everyone in this world who will ever try. From this point forward, the only person who matters to me .. is me.

While, we're on that subject, if you don't like who I am, how I act, or what I'm doing .. remove me from your life because you can be damn sure that I'm removing you from mine. All this negative shit has got to go. You're not running my life anymore.

On that note, adios.

Life is just a mirror, and what you see out there, you must first see inside of you.
-Wally 'Famous' Amos

005

For some strange reason, people I've encountered on the internet have become really lame.
I'm not sure if they have always been that lame or if I'm just now noticing it.
Going out of their way to make me look bad.
I know it's not jealousy because honestly, what is there to be jealous of?

Grow up, people.
REALLY.

004

I have absolutely nothing to write about.

Just got a new layout. It's cute as shit, I know.

Uh, my parents went to the lake this weekend. I stayed here and did absolutely nothing except lay around the house. I did clean my room, the kitchen and washed my clothes. I guess that counts for something. I was pretty much living off dinosaur shaped chicken nuggets and chicken quesedillas all weekend because my parents took all the freaking food with them. However, they came home today with all kinds of shit. Cookies, brownies, ice cream sundaes, MILK, candy, cheetos. I'm in Junkfood Heaven. I'm trying not to eat it, though. Oh, the temptation.

I'm talking to Jocey on Y! and I'm being super nosey.
Whatever.

Uh, shoutouts like it's 106 & Park to all of you.
I'm just too lazy to write all of your names out, sorry.

003

I was just looking at pictures of my friends and I on facebook.
I realized how much we've all changed. Some for the better, some for the worst.
We've all grown apart, even if we are still together.
I really miss who we all used to be.
I look at these people and I don't like them anymore.
They're not the people I became best friends with.


Who are we?

002

001

“I didn't ask for it to be over, but then again, I never asked for it to begin. For that's the way it is with life, as some of the most beautiful days come completely by chance. But even the most beautiful days eventually have their sunsets.”

Shit hasn't been going on in my life. I'll be moving back to Valdosta on the 13th. School starts back on the 18th. I've been wasting away my summer being lazy as shit, but what else is new? I'm so ready to go back, but I'm most excited about school shopping. Yeah, I'm a nerd when it comes to that shit, but I always look forward to it. Nothing like a new pack of pencils. I've started getting pretty interested in photography; I took the sunset picture about two weeks ago. Sometimes I just see things & snap a photo. I'm hoping to get a nice camera for Christmas, but we'll see.
That's all for now. Might update when shit actually happens in my life.